Yes, crippling cricket bore Shane Warne is back and he's still loving his miracle hair growth from Advanced Hair Studio. Previous adverts for the 'service' looked like a particularly cheap 'Cash my Hair' advert. This time though, they've clearly drafted in the new Stephen Spielberg, Max Crapowski to direct this new advert and thank the heavens that they've chosen to go for class over cheap jokes and embarassingly poor stereotypes.
Oh.
So the advert opens with a shot of "Warney" winning at some cricket, which apparently he used to do quite a lot. They do this because he retired from cricket quite a while ago and doesn't have that same 'household name' appeal that he may once have had amongst people who don't like cricket.
It then cuts away (beautifully, I might add) to the ex-cricketer signing autographs for a couple of guys who don't actually look like they have any interest in cricket, Warne or the advert being made. This is to reinforce the fact that you should know who he is and how dare you if you don't, you cretin!
There is then another beautiful cutaway where you feel as if you're careening headlong into the White Cliffs of Dover before you realise that it's actually someone's teeth.
Yes, dear reader, it's our hero of the hour or "Sergeant Smug", to give him his full military rank. This cheeky chappy/master of dares decides that his mate should be asking their cricket hero about the fact that he's lost his hair. It's a sensible idea, I mean; the guy's only one of Australia's most famous cricketers, it's surprising they don't ask about his breakfast.
So off the gawky-looking lad pops to ask a man about being bald. All incredibly hilarious. Apparently. If you're not convinced by now then maybe a pun will help? Of course they will. That pun in full:
Exceptional stuff. Warney then explains that without Advanced Hair Studio he'd look either like a bright red cricket ball or a Cylon from Battlestar Galactica
Close enough?
Oh.
So the advert opens with a shot of "Warney" winning at some cricket, which apparently he used to do quite a lot. They do this because he retired from cricket quite a while ago and doesn't have that same 'household name' appeal that he may once have had amongst people who don't like cricket.
It then cuts away (beautifully, I might add) to the ex-cricketer signing autographs for a couple of guys who don't actually look like they have any interest in cricket, Warne or the advert being made. This is to reinforce the fact that you should know who he is and how dare you if you don't, you cretin!
There is then another beautiful cutaway where you feel as if you're careening headlong into the White Cliffs of Dover before you realise that it's actually someone's teeth.
Yes, dear reader, it's our hero of the hour or "Sergeant Smug", to give him his full military rank. This cheeky chappy/master of dares decides that his mate should be asking their cricket hero about the fact that he's lost his hair. It's a sensible idea, I mean; the guy's only one of Australia's most famous cricketers, it's surprising they don't ask about his breakfast.
So off the gawky-looking lad pops to ask a man about being bald. All incredibly hilarious. Apparently. If you're not convinced by now then maybe a pun will help? Of course they will. That pun in full:
Is it true, or just great spin?
Exceptional stuff. Warney then explains that without Advanced Hair Studio he'd look either like a bright red cricket ball or a Cylon from Battlestar Galactica
Close enough?
Don't miss the real point of the whole advert though, readers. Warney says that without 'Advanced Hair Studio' countless men would have heads like an enflamed, shiny spot. Countless. When you count to zero, that's countless too isn't it?
NB: I'm aware this advert's from Australia but there is a UK version which has a different number at the end (obviously).
NB: I'm aware this advert's from Australia but there is a UK version which has a different number at the end (obviously).
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